Still nothing to report. Struggling with whether to POAS or not but not sure I am ready for any disappointments so another day rolls along.
DH and I are considering a non-medicated or natural IVF cycle if this cycle does not work. I haven't yet researched the mechanics of how such a cycle works but I think that it involves constant monitoring to see how your egg is developing and when it is about 18-20, you will be given a trigger shot to release the egg from the follicle. RE will basically retrieve using the same method as he does in regular IVF and DH will provide his "sample" and you wait to hear whether there was fertilization or not. The primary difference is that you are doing this "sans" all the regular IVF medications.
As I mentioned earlier, I have fibroids as well as endometriosis and both do not respond well to most of the medication that is given during a regular IVF cycle. The high doses of estrogen can lead to increased growths in both Fibroids and Endometriomas. My RE will probably fight this decision but I think it's the best one for my optimal long term health.
This post is not in any way intended to be critical of IVF protocols but simply to share our plans and why we are opting to go this route.
On a positive note, Easter is almost here and the weather will be lovely, so time to dust off the worries of winter and embrace the beauty of Spring...new life and that's what I am praying is happening within me right now...new life.....
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
5dp5dt
First of all, I was so excited to see my "first follower"...Hi Jenny and thank you for answering my questions re the assisted hatching. I think part of the reason we were so nervous about doing it was the fact that we were only aware of it the day before the transfer and so not enough time to get our heads around it. Hopefully this lil one will be strong enough to 'hatch' out on its own.
My Emotions are running the full gamut...happy, nervous, sad....and it goes on. No symptoms at least none that I can really feel is indicative of a pregnancy. My boobs are not sore at least not that I can tell. My left boob feels a bit odd but not sore more of a stretchy feeling. Bit crampy today but that may be due to a cyst that I have on my left ovary.
Another day...rolls along.
My Emotions are running the full gamut...happy, nervous, sad....and it goes on. No symptoms at least none that I can really feel is indicative of a pregnancy. My boobs are not sore at least not that I can tell. My left boob feels a bit odd but not sore more of a stretchy feeling. Bit crampy today but that may be due to a cyst that I have on my left ovary.
Another day...rolls along.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
FET 1dp5dt
Our snow baby (the blastocyst) survived the thawing and was successfully transferred to mama's uterus. Up until minutes before the retrieval we had no idea whether he/she had survived. Our clinic offers Assisted Hatching which we opted not to do given that potential disadvantages include congenital defects (conjoined twins, missing limbs etc.) and only increases the odds of implantation by 5%. Our RE didn't think this embryo would survive to blastocyst stage as it was only an 8 cell grade 3 embryo but it did and so we have hope that our little boy or girl will continue to be a fighter.
Apart from an acupuncture treatment after the transfer, I did little else. Hubby made yet another delicious breakfast. At the end of my acupuncture session the acupuncturist suggested that i eat a lot of walnuts and grapes. Well hubby took that quite seriously and immediately went and bought 2 large packets of walnuts and bulging bag of grapes. I had walnuts in my scrambled eggs...enough said :)
Apart from an acupuncture treatment after the transfer, I did little else. Hubby made yet another delicious breakfast. At the end of my acupuncture session the acupuncturist suggested that i eat a lot of walnuts and grapes. Well hubby took that quite seriously and immediately went and bought 2 large packets of walnuts and bulging bag of grapes. I had walnuts in my scrambled eggs...enough said :)
Friday, March 19, 2010
FET and more
It's been a few weeks since I have posted but we are preparing for round 2 of IVF #1 which is an FET. For those new to infertile world, this means Frozen Embryo Transfer. It's a bit easier on the body but definitely harder on the bum :(
My protocol includes taking 2 estrogen pills 3x/day. I'm not really crazy about doing this as I think it could have future dire consequences but it is done to help the endometrium develop into a nice moist cushiony (not sure if this is a word but nevertheless it stays...) bed for the little one.
I also continue with my folic acid, prednisone, baby aspirin and the dreaded PIO ( progesterone in oil) OUCHHHH!!!! This is an intramuscular shot and boy you feel it for hours. Because it is oil based, it does not dissolve very easily and can form huge lumps which then become painful. I have been hobbling for the last week and the heating pad is my constant companion, at least until tomorrow night when the FET is performed. Embryos do not respond well to scents and heat so as of tomorrow cold showers and I will have to find another way to deal with my sore bum. If we do succeed and have a BFP, I will have to continue with the shots until the end of the first trimester and possibly even the second...Nice :(
Last night hubby and I went to our first Infertility Group meeting. As soon as I noticed the box of tissues prominently placed in the middle of the room, I knew this was going to be tough and it was. There were lots of tears and the occasional rant and lots of husbands who dutifully collected tissues for the sobbing wives and partners. Despite our initial trepidation, in the end it felt really good to be there and bond with the other couples. I have made two connections and hopefully we can support each other through this journey, because only another infertile (and my sister) can truly understand the loss that you feel each month when the dreaded Aunt Flo makes her visit.
On another note, I had an acupuncture treatment today and as usual fell asleep on the table. Still trying to decide whether it is the treatment or the music. Another is scheduled for tomorrow after the transfer and then home to bed for 48 hrs, longer if hubby had the final say. I don't think it is necessary to stay in bed for the entire week. we did that the last time and alas, BFN. I will return to work on Monday, work a shorter day and come home and rest. I feel physically fine except for the bum :) so here's hoping that all goes well tomorrow.
My protocol includes taking 2 estrogen pills 3x/day. I'm not really crazy about doing this as I think it could have future dire consequences but it is done to help the endometrium develop into a nice moist cushiony (not sure if this is a word but nevertheless it stays...) bed for the little one.
I also continue with my folic acid, prednisone, baby aspirin and the dreaded PIO ( progesterone in oil) OUCHHHH!!!! This is an intramuscular shot and boy you feel it for hours. Because it is oil based, it does not dissolve very easily and can form huge lumps which then become painful. I have been hobbling for the last week and the heating pad is my constant companion, at least until tomorrow night when the FET is performed. Embryos do not respond well to scents and heat so as of tomorrow cold showers and I will have to find another way to deal with my sore bum. If we do succeed and have a BFP, I will have to continue with the shots until the end of the first trimester and possibly even the second...Nice :(
Last night hubby and I went to our first Infertility Group meeting. As soon as I noticed the box of tissues prominently placed in the middle of the room, I knew this was going to be tough and it was. There were lots of tears and the occasional rant and lots of husbands who dutifully collected tissues for the sobbing wives and partners. Despite our initial trepidation, in the end it felt really good to be there and bond with the other couples. I have made two connections and hopefully we can support each other through this journey, because only another infertile (and my sister) can truly understand the loss that you feel each month when the dreaded Aunt Flo makes her visit.
On another note, I had an acupuncture treatment today and as usual fell asleep on the table. Still trying to decide whether it is the treatment or the music. Another is scheduled for tomorrow after the transfer and then home to bed for 48 hrs, longer if hubby had the final say. I don't think it is necessary to stay in bed for the entire week. we did that the last time and alas, BFN. I will return to work on Monday, work a shorter day and come home and rest. I feel physically fine except for the bum :) so here's hoping that all goes well tomorrow.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
BFN
There were tears and more tears and hugs and above of all a feeling of absolute sadness. It won't be official until Monday when our RE does the bloodtest but at this point I am not feeling any symptons...no that's not true, I am feeling lots of cramps and more cramps and nausea and a weird metallic taste in my mouth...pregnant...no...PMS...big fat YES!!!
Heading out to an Art show but would rather be at home trying to get my head around this setback. We will try again as soon as it is possible. I wish I were in NY with my friends and family or back home with my sister who has been really supportive through this entire process. She has the amazing ability to be comforting without being stifling or pushy and is very respectful of people's boundaries...thank you Baby Sis :)
J has been great and really stepped up to the plate. I do think we have become a bit stronger through all this and have truly functioned as a team.
Heading out to an Art show but would rather be at home trying to get my head around this setback. We will try again as soon as it is possible. I wish I were in NY with my friends and family or back home with my sister who has been really supportive through this entire process. She has the amazing ability to be comforting without being stifling or pushy and is very respectful of people's boundaries...thank you Baby Sis :)
J has been great and really stepped up to the plate. I do think we have become a bit stronger through all this and have truly functioned as a team.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Tiger's apology
Allow me to digress a bit....while I believe that this is a matter between him and his wife and NO ONE else, he is a public figure and as such should be held to a higher standard. It's one of the trade offs of fame. About the apology...hmmm...should have occurred sooner but I do think he was sincere. I applaud Elin for not showing up with a plastic smile to support him...he betrayed her in the worst possible way and no doubt it will take many months, years for that trust to be regained.
For any husbands reading this...don't do it!!
Enough said!
For any husbands reading this...don't do it!!
Enough said!
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Cycle Monitoring
I was put on birth control for 10 days. During this time I was also self-injecting Lupron (this drug was used to prevent premature ovulation by suppressing the pituitary gland). It worked and I was "suppressed" and on day 1 of my period I began full cycle monitoring for our IVF. This entailed going to the RE every other day for about 5 days. On those days I had a vaginal ultrasound, blood drawn (to test the hormone levels), and a review with the RE of the prior day's results.
My protocol included:
*Lupron (self injected 1x day) - suppression drug
*Gonal F and Repronex (injected in bum by dear hubby 1x/day) - stimulate ovaries to produce multiple eggs
*Prednisone - Steroid to counter any potential auto immune disorders
*Baby Aspirin daily - prevent any clotting
*Materna - Vitamins
*Thyroid pills - precautionary to give thyroid added boost and ensure overall health
*Estrace - Fake estrogen (like i need more estrogen)
*Progesterone Suppositories - to aid in implantation, build up the uterine lining
*Host of Antibiotics - Precautionary - to ward off any potential bacterial infection ( both hubby and I had to take this for 3 days and then I for an additional few days after the retrieval).
*Pain killers - proud of myself - only took 1 and practised every form of meditation, prayer and deep breathing to deal with the pain/discomfort.
*Bottles and Bottles of Gatorade (hate the stuff and tried to supplement with Coconut water) and soups - to prevent fluid retention
Stimualtion period was okay for the most part but by day 9, my ovaries felt like 2 watermelons about to explode. Day of retrieval was horrible. J had no trouble producing a sample ...hmmm..speedy gonzales
RETRIEVAL DAY
The actual retrieval is a blur as I was heavily sedated but 15 eggs were retrieved but only 6 were mature. 6 of 6 fertilized. I had a horrible reaction to the medication and could barely stand up due to the nausea and gut wrenching puking (I was later told by one of the nurses that I may have been given too much medication).
That evening, J presented me with an early Valentines day gift (and yes it was a surprise because we are not the type of couple that celebrates the occasion but it was a much appreciated surprise).
TRANSFER DAY ( Incidentally Family Day:))
Easy as pie, no pain or medication!!! At this point we had 6 embryos (all perfect 8 cells, embryos can range from 4-8 cells). We decided to implant 2, freeze 2 and leave the remaining 2 in the lab for further growth. Embryos are often graded 1 being the best and 5 being the worst or vice versa. We had 1 #1, 3 #2s and 2#3s which we fondly call our ugly ducklings. the ducklings were left in the lab for an additional 2 days and the hope was that they would rebel and become "swans" or medically known as blastocysts. The diference between a blastocyst and an embryo is that the latter has 70-100 cells whereas the former is comprised of 4-8 cells.
Many centres choose to perform a 3-day transfer (embryo) but 5-day transfers (blastocysts) are also quite common. Some research has shown higher implantation rates with a 5-day transfer which is more in line (timing) with the location and stage that a normal pregnancy would be at that point.
UPDATE
one of the little guys made it to the blastocyst stage and the other expired. So as of now we have 2 in utero, 2 frozen embryos and 1 frozen blastocyst (otherwise know as our snow babies).
My protocol included:
*Lupron (self injected 1x day) - suppression drug
*Gonal F and Repronex (injected in bum by dear hubby 1x/day) - stimulate ovaries to produce multiple eggs
*Prednisone - Steroid to counter any potential auto immune disorders
*Baby Aspirin daily - prevent any clotting
*Materna - Vitamins
*Thyroid pills - precautionary to give thyroid added boost and ensure overall health
*Estrace - Fake estrogen (like i need more estrogen)
*Progesterone Suppositories - to aid in implantation, build up the uterine lining
*Host of Antibiotics - Precautionary - to ward off any potential bacterial infection ( both hubby and I had to take this for 3 days and then I for an additional few days after the retrieval).
*Pain killers - proud of myself - only took 1 and practised every form of meditation, prayer and deep breathing to deal with the pain/discomfort.
*Bottles and Bottles of Gatorade (hate the stuff and tried to supplement with Coconut water) and soups - to prevent fluid retention
Stimualtion period was okay for the most part but by day 9, my ovaries felt like 2 watermelons about to explode. Day of retrieval was horrible. J had no trouble producing a sample ...hmmm..speedy gonzales
RETRIEVAL DAY
The actual retrieval is a blur as I was heavily sedated but 15 eggs were retrieved but only 6 were mature. 6 of 6 fertilized. I had a horrible reaction to the medication and could barely stand up due to the nausea and gut wrenching puking (I was later told by one of the nurses that I may have been given too much medication).
That evening, J presented me with an early Valentines day gift (and yes it was a surprise because we are not the type of couple that celebrates the occasion but it was a much appreciated surprise).
TRANSFER DAY ( Incidentally Family Day:))
Easy as pie, no pain or medication!!! At this point we had 6 embryos (all perfect 8 cells, embryos can range from 4-8 cells). We decided to implant 2, freeze 2 and leave the remaining 2 in the lab for further growth. Embryos are often graded 1 being the best and 5 being the worst or vice versa. We had 1 #1, 3 #2s and 2#3s which we fondly call our ugly ducklings. the ducklings were left in the lab for an additional 2 days and the hope was that they would rebel and become "swans" or medically known as blastocysts. The diference between a blastocyst and an embryo is that the latter has 70-100 cells whereas the former is comprised of 4-8 cells.
Many centres choose to perform a 3-day transfer (embryo) but 5-day transfers (blastocysts) are also quite common. Some research has shown higher implantation rates with a 5-day transfer which is more in line (timing) with the location and stage that a normal pregnancy would be at that point.
UPDATE
one of the little guys made it to the blastocyst stage and the other expired. So as of now we have 2 in utero, 2 frozen embryos and 1 frozen blastocyst (otherwise know as our snow babies).
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